Danny
Wallace
Danny Wallace is
planning to spend the next three months perched in a tree on a remote
Pacific island. But it's not the premise of another rib-tickling project
from the man behind the extraordinary Join Me phenomenon and How To
Start Your Own Country series. No, Danny is about to present the BBC's
Castaway and this, he tells Nicola Hicks, is the one way he's guaranteed
not to miss a thing...
A tiny, isolated island two hours off the coast of New Zealand will
soon be home to the intrepid group of men and women taking part in the
long-awaited second series of Castaway – the ultimate social experiment.
For three months, it'll also be home to journalist, author and presenter
Danny Wallace. Danny will be bringing viewers all the latest news, twists
and turns from the nascent island community in an unmissable weekly
BBC One programme, as well as fronting Castaway – The Last 24
Hours, a behind-the-scenes, gossip-filled catch-up show four nights
a week on BBC Three.
But if you think he'll be spending his time in between soaking up the
sun on a pristine beach or communing with the wildlife in this eco paradise,
you'd be quite wrong.
"Most of the time I'm going to be up a tree
with a pair of binoculars, spying on the castaways and trying to lip-read
what they're saying," says Danny, as he takes a break from
packing his bags.
"I fully expect to be utterly addicted to
this show. It's going to be like having my own live streaming service
– only in real life, not on the telly!"
Dundee-born Danny, 30, was hooked when the original Castaway, set on
the Scottish island of Taransay, was screened seven years ago.
"There had never been anything like it before
and I thought it was crazy. Then I started watching it and I was instantly
hooked. It was amazing, a kind of 'pure' reality show. It wasn't about
meddling, it was about documenting the ups and downs, the highs and
lows, the fights and the love, so it was extraordinary," he
says.
"I think that this time around it's going
to hold onto those values, if you like, but move with the times, so
there will be the things that people have come to expect, the twists
and the turns. Hopefully, it'll be the best of both worlds and I'm really
looking forward to getting to know all the characters."
Danny's already had a sneak preview of those characters but remains
tight-lipped about who they are.
"I've seen the audition tapes and they're
people I'm itching to talk about but I'm sworn to secrecy. I haven't
even told my mum," he grins.
"I can tell you that they're a disparate
bunch and not the kind of people you normally get on reality shows.
There's no one who desperately wants to be on the cover of a men's magazine,
there's no one who's got an agent and no one's about to release their
first single. They're people who it's going to be a bit of a journey
for. I know that sounds a bit cheesy but it's true – this experience
could mean a lot to them."
"When you see tapes of auditions for other shows, people are always
talking about their personality and what they're like. But these people
talked about their backgrounds and their life stories and that's where
the secrets lie, that's where the key to them is. I do think they're
going to become our friends for three months."
Despite this, Danny says he'd be none too keen to actually be one of
the castaways as they eke out new lives on the other side of the world.
"I'll probably be quite jealous of their
experience, but I know that I'm romanticising it because I've seen the
island and how beautiful it is. I'm forgetting that there's no electricity
and no mobile phone signals and no luxuries of any kind,"
he says.
"It sounds idyllic at first and it might
be brilliant for a couple of days, but then you might start to miss
your morning frappucino and, if I'm honest, I'm not really one for roughing
it."
"Having said that, they haven't actually told me where I'm staying
yet and they waited until I'd signed the contract before revealing that
there's a massive rat problem on the island, so I am starting to wonder..."
Let's hope the castaways are made of sterner stuff. Physically, psychologically
and emotionally removed from their current lives as far as possible,
they'll be building their community from scratch and, along the way,
discovering just what's most important to them.
"They have to do pretty much everything,
from finding out what they're going to eat to actually building their
shelter. There aren't going to be any hand-outs – it's not like
I'm going to turn up with the sandwiches," says Danny.
"Perhaps more importantly, they'll also need
to work out what it is they actually need in life, whether that's material
stuff or emotional ties, because they'll be stripped of all of that
and really going back to basics."
You may remember that Danny – or, to give him his formal title,
King Danny I – set up a new country a couple of years ago. With
the help of a BBC Two series, How To Start Your Own Country, he found
himself the head of a principality with more than 50,000 "citizens",
which he continues to rule from his independent territory (his one-bedroom
flat in East London).
Given these credentials, you'd think he could offer the castaways some
handy advice about setting up their own "breakaway nation"
on their new island home.
Danny brings viewers all the latest news from the nascent island community
"It's not that straightforward,"
he frowns. "It was quite easy when I set
up a country because I was in charge and there was no one else at the
beginning. So I made all the decisions and that worked out fine. That's
not going to be the case for the castaways. From the off, someone's
got to be brave enough to step out and say, 'Right, to get this done
today, I need to take charge'."
"The question is: will they go on a power trip and will they become
power-hungry? Will the others resent them for that, or will they accept
it? And when does it all become a democracy?"
"If I had to give them advice, it would be to start with a benevolent
dictatorship, then resign and move towards democracy ... and then that's
when you do your national anthem."
Despite his two years' experience as a member of royalty, Danny, a former
BBC producer, is not convinced that he's the kind of person the castaways
would be willing to accept as their leader.
"They'd probably find it irritating that
I'm always trying to sing my national anthem and have people salute
me. They may find the constant insistence on curtseying slightly annoying
and the fact that I'd try to introduce my own currency when I owe them
money. You know, little niggles ... the little things we all do,"
he smiles.
Power struggles aside, the presenter believes that one of the greatest
challenges facing the group will be how to cope with the psychological
pressure of being thrust into a community of total strangers from whom
there is no escape.
"I think the secret will be to find someone
to bond with quite quickly and to try not to be divisive. You probably
need to lose any sense of bitchiness and avoid gossip, which, when you've
got nothing else to do, would be incredibly hard, especially in a high-pressure
environment where every little event is magnified," he says.
"I don't know if I'd be able to cope with
it. On some shows I've seen, people start off one way and, as time goes
by, elements of their personality start to emerge that maybe they've
suppressed because they don't like them. I think everyone has light
and shade to them. I'd be really worried that, after a few weeks, I'd
start to get grumpy or I'd say things I didn't mean because of the pressure."
Danny, however, will see just how the castaways are coping for himself
when he joins them once a week to spring a surprise upon the group during
the live BBC One programme.
"Each week, I will reveal something to them
– and it could be anything," he explains. "It
won't be regimented but it will keep them on their toes, so they might
grow to become quite cautious of me."
When pressed, he reveals that the "something" could be a challenge
or a change that will see the group evolve – and could even involve
viewers at home.
"There will be chances for viewers to get
involved in various different ways – it's going to be a very interactive
series. There will also be the chance for one viewer to actually come
out and join the castaways part way through," he says, guardedly.
"But there'll be more details on all that
when the series starts."
One person newlywed Danny hopes will be jetting out to the island is
his wife, Greta, from whom he'll otherwise be separated until the summer.
"What makes it worse is that there are no
mobile phones and so no texting. One of the main shops on the island
proudly advertises its fax service, so I could fax home ... but faxes
aren't very romantic, are they? There is pigeon post, though! I've got
to do that to test it out. Not sure you can give the pigeon a specific
address in London and it'll turn up, but I'm willing to give it a go!"
As Danny prepares to get back to the urgent task of packing his case,
only one questions remains: while he's keeping an eye on this burgeoning
community in the Pacific Ocean, just who will be looking after his own
country back home?
"My Minister of Defence, former supermarket
security guard John Bond," he says. "He's
on stand-by and has said that he'll move into the flat if I want him
to. Obviously, I'll make him sign a contract saying he'll give it back
when I return ... and I'll still be King, you know."
By Nicola
Hicks
TV
Previews March '07
